Thomas Kilmann Styles of Approaching Conflict

There’s no doubt that people have different ways of handling conflict and that these different styles affect the outcomes of conflict. A conflict style is defined as a patterned response or behavior that people use when approaching conflict. One of the most widely recognized models of conflict styles was developed by Kilmann and Thomas. The Kilmann–Thomas model identifies five conflict styles: avoidance, competition, accommodation, compromise, and collaboration.

This model describes conflict styles along two dimensions: assertiveness and cooperativeness. Assertiveness refers to attempts to satisfy one’s own concerns, while cooperativeness represents attempts to satisfy the concerns of others. Each conflict style is characterized by how much assertiveness and how much cooperativeness an individual shows when confronting conflict.

Because of past experiences or situational factors, some people may rely more heavily on one conflict style than on others. Understanding them can help you select the conflict style that is most appropriate to the demands of the situation.

Avoidance is both an unassertive and an uncooperative conflict style. Those who favor the avoidance style tend to be passive and ignore conflict situations rather than confront them directly. Avoiders are not assertive about pursuing their own interests, nor are they cooperative in assisting others to pursue theirs.

Competition is a conflict style of individuals who are highly assertive about pursuing their own goals but uncooperative in assisting others to reach theirs. A competitive style is essentially a win-lose conflict strategy. Accommodation is an unassertive but cooperative conflict style. An approach that is “other directed,” accommodation requires individuals to attend very closely to the needs of others and ignore their own needs.

Compromise occurs halfway between competition and accommodation and involves both a degree of assertiveness and a degree of cooperativeness. Compromisers attend to the concerns of others as well as to their own needs. Collaboration requires both assertiveness and cooperation. It is when both parties agree to a positive settlement to the conflict and attend fully to the other’s concerns while not sacrificing or suppressing their own.

The conflict is not resolved until each side is reasonably satisfied and can support the solution. Collaboration recognizes the inevitability of human conflict. It confronts conflict, and then uses conflict to produce constructive outcomes.